Archive | January 2016

How Can I Be a Blessing in Your Life Today?

Each day I try to focus on what I have to be grateful for and the blessings in my life.  I know some days this is easier than others because let’s face it, life happens and things sometimes seem overwhelming.  I can always find 10 things relatively quickly to be grateful for but when I speak to others about doing this I frequently get resistance.  Huh! If I had something to be grateful for I’d be happy.  If I didn’t have to go to work everyday I’d be happy.  If I was healthy I’d be happy.  If my kids; spouse; _________(you fill in the blank) then I could be happy. If I didn’t have to stress or worry about money then I’d be happy.  And it goes on and on.  Yet in every one of those scenarios the person has a plethora of things to be grateful for.  A roof over their head, food to eat, a job to go to, a spouse, children, air to breathe, they’re alive; hope!  Truth is we all have so much to be grateful for yet we choose not to see it.  We are so focused on what is wrong with us; with our family, friends, co workers, community, country, etc. that we get caught up in the negative and don’t stop to focus on the positive.

I use to be the most negative person (not authentically on the inside but by living with that mindset most of my life I just looked for it automatically). I would look for reason to doubt, for the crack in the logic, someone to mess up (you know it’s always going to happen; we are all human after all and no one is perfect), the disappointment, etc.  What I found was more to doubt, people who mess up, disappointment, judgement, etc.  Galatians 6:7 states it clearly: Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

So what you look for you find!  The good news is you can train your mind to look for the good in every situation.  No, not every situation is good but there is something to be grateful for in every situation!  You are learning, growing, experiencing change in every failure, defeat, heartbreak, and encounter in your life.  Like a diamond that has to be heated, cut, and polished to make the beautiful stone you need to be experience many failures, heartbreaks, events in your life to learn and grow.  My grandparents death was without a doubt THE worst thing that has ever happened to me but even in that tragic event I am grateful for all the love, memories, unconditional love and support they gave me.  I am grateful that neither of them lived longer than they could take care of themselves because that was their prayer as long as I can remember.  I am grateful for the foundation they gave me to be a productive, contributing citizen in this world.  You CAN find the good in every situation.  You just have to look from that mindset.  Asking yourself what positive could possibly come from this.  Why am I in this place at this time.  I remember just a little over a month ago driving to the college one morning and in the blink of an eye watching as an automobile was hit and went flying into another lane of traffic colliding with another vehicle during morning rush hour traffic and thinking to myself, Praise God that I was not in that lane this morning because that was the lane I was frequently in but because the traffic was so bad I had to move to a further lane that day.  What if the traffic had been lighter? It might have been me.  Or when you’re running late and you’re frustrated and upset about the situation…ask yourself; what might I be avoiding by running late?  I have heard people say they were late getting to work or their plane on 9/11  and they avoided being killed, either on the ground or in the airplanes, that are grateful they were late that particular morning.

I would like to invite you to take a 30 day challenge that I KNOW will impact your life because it did mine.  Every morning get up and ask yourself “How can I be a blessing to someone else today?”  Look for someone you can be of service to.  Whether it’s a woman with a child that could use help with a door being opened, a senior who may need assistance, someone in line that is in a hurry and may need to go first, your neighbor who hasn’t had time to cut their lawn, someone in a nursing home that would love to talk, a veteran who could use a ride to the doctor or a word of appreciation for their service, maybe drive to the area of your city where the homeless are and take a bag with toiletries such as a toothbrush, toothpaste, baby wipes, comb, toilet paper, etc. and a sandwich or snacks.  Take the extra “stuff” you don’t know what to do with to the homeless or battered woman’s shelter.  Do you know a single parent?  Offer to watch their child or children for a couple of hours so they can run errands, clean house, or take a bath!  They need a break which is great for them and their children.  Why you ask would you want to do this?  Glad you asked! The more you do for others the better you feel, the more your heart opens up, and the more grateful you become.  The more grateful you are with what you have the more you will be given to be grateful for.  The more we focus on the “I” the smaller and more confining our world feels.  The more negative we view life.  The more we focus on others and being a contribution the more grateful we are and the more we are given to be grateful for.

So just for today ask yourself How can I be a blessing in someone’s life?  Then look for ways to be a blessing in the lives of others.  It can be your spouse, child, friend, or stranger’s life.  At the end of the day reflect back and write at least 5 things you are grateful for.  Do this each morning for 30 days and increase what you’re grateful for to 10 things each day over the 30 day time period.  I have established a facebook page where we can post our experiences, our daily gratitude list if you like, support each other along the way and start a massive movement of people who would like to make a difference in the lives of others and in the process transform your own life.  PLEASE join me! https://www.facebook.com/howcanIbeablessinginyourlifetoday/?skip_nax_wizard=true  I am praying for each of you to be a blessing in at least one person’s life today.  I am declaring that it is possible for us to make a difference in our own lives by making a difference in another person’s life today!

Why is someone else’s journey always easier than our own?

Isn’t it amazing how we can look around at others and see how easy they have it?  Make assumptions, judgements and declarations without any true knowledge of what their story truly is?  Many times a week I have people contact me because they are beginning their weight loss journey or are struggling with losing their weight and they want to know what I have done, what’s been successful, and what the secret is to my success.  I LOVE helping others and feel it is my responsibility because when I started this journey I promised God that if he would help me lose the weight then I would use my testimony to help others.

As many of you already know I was overweight most of my life.  I struggled with weight on and off most of my adult life.  I have been ignored, looked over, talked about, snickered at, and experienced discrimination from being obese.  I know many people think that obesity is a choice.  You wake up eat anything you want, as much as you want, and can’t control yourself.  Pretty simple. Unfortunately, that usually isn’t the case.  For many of us that are overweight it happened one day at a time; one stress, one heartbreak, one loss, one disappointment at a time.  Mine started when my parents divorced and I learned to comfort myself with food.  However, at four and a half years old I had no clue that’s what I was doing.  Funny thing is I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing until I was 50!  I saw a picture (something I avoided like the plague) of myself and couldn’t believe how heavy I was!! Yes I have a mirror but saw what I wanted to see in the mirror. Before with Brianna as Homecoming Princess

When I began this journey I believed getting the weight off was the answer to all my problems! I thought once I was thin I would look great, have confidence, my husband would be so happy, my children would be so proud of me and I would be on top of the world! All my problems would be solved. Oh boy was I wrong! (laughing)  I had a counselor tell me that before it was over I would feel like I had been through a war and I remember thinking I don’t know what he’s talking about.  It’s going to be amazing.

Then I released the weight. 134 pounds to be exact.  Those around me had been used to the overweight, food induced coma I was living in and were comfortable with that scenario.  So when I came alive and looked like the person I felt like on the inside, I started living! Truly living with purpose and conviction and energy and power.  Many of the people around me couldn’t handle the real me and they resisted.  Some of them got angry because they couldn’t treat me the way they had in the past because I set boundaries, I said no, I had my voice back.  I don’t mean I was being unreasonable or that they were being mean; just that it was different and uncomfortable for them.  I had been a people pleaser (still working on this) and always put everyone else before myself; which isn’t healthy for anyone!! NOW I KNOW what the counselor was talking about when he said I would feel like I had been through a war before it was over!

As I mentioned in the beginning I work with people everyday who want to know my secret.  They say things like it’s wonderful that you have been able to do it but I don’t know if I can. You’re so much stronger than I am. You have so much willpower.  I don’t like a lot of foods.  I’ve always been heavy I just don’t know if I can do it.  My ______ just died.  I have a lot of health issues.  I’m having marriage issues.  I have a lot of stress with my job.  You get the picture!  I have helped many people including myself release a lot of weight.  I have helped people who have been abused; mentally, physically,  and sexually.  I have helped elderly people, men, women, children, people who have stress from family issues, jobs, health issues, financial issues, you name it!  We all, every single one of us who carry extra weight, have issues we are dealing with on a regular basis.  The only difference between me and someone who is starting and scared is the belief that you CAN do it.  In the beginning, I couldn’t imagine releasing 134 pounds so I broke it down in to smaller, manageable goals and made one choice at a time and listened to my coach and did what she said because I didn’t know what to do.  Here’s a link to my previous blog post on where to begin: http://nenaholt.blogspot.com/2014/07/six-steps-to-successful-weight-loss.html

nothing worth having comes easy

What I want you to know is that it wasn’t easier for me than it is for you.  I didn’t have any magic wand or bewitch’s power nose to twitch; I also didn’t have a coach who had released 100 + pounds so much of it I had to figure out on my own.  It starts by a decision that you are going to quit putting yourself last.  You are going to make the choice one day and quite frankly, one minute at a time some days, to be the best you can be.  You have to work on your mindset and YOU most of all. I will not tell you it is easy because it isn’t but I do PROMISE you it is worth it.  Being healthy, having energy, being able to sleep well, and love living life is THEEEEE BEST feeling and there is no way to put into words how amazing it is.

So the next time you look at someone else and think…Wow! I wish I could do that; I want you to know two things: First, YOU CAN DO IT and second it may look easy but I guarantee behind each one of us is a backstory that you probably wouldn’t imagine by just looking on the outside.  The choice is yours!!

The 3 C's Choices, chances, change

This entry was posted on January 12, 2016. 2 Comments